Love Letters

Wikipedia states - A love letter is a romantic way to express feelings of love in written form. Whether delivered by hand, mail, carrier pigeon, or romantically left in a secret location, the letter may be of anything from a short and simple message of love to a lengthy explanation of feelings. Love letters may 'move through the widest range of emotions, devotion, disappointment, grief and indignation, self-confidence, ambition, impatience, self-reproach and resignation

I once received a love letter when I was 7 years old– it was secretly passed down the row and I unfolded it to find a declaration of love from a boy who I had never noticed – I gave the note to my teacher who in turn reprimanded the little boy for inappropriate behaviour in a classroom – My brother of the age of 10 was then informed of this young boys desire to love his sister and was chased down the road and threatened to be beaten up – young love – the desire to express it – the desire to protect from the one true emotion that should be mandatory for our lives to revolve around.

34 years later consumed by love  I sit here pondering my first love letter – scrawled in a 7 year old's scribbles – how I wish I had returned his gesture and reciprocated his innocence and had promised to love this boy who was brave enough to express – I am still not that brave.

I have lived within a wall and withheld all the letters of love inside with me – I have searched for a purpose but it was not found – I have searched the heights and depths of my own heart but unwillingly resigned to a lie that Love Letters do not exist. Oh to believe such a lie and to not seek out the truth

It has taken me years to stumble across the truth after a lifetime of fumbling in the dark - to see the truth, to feel the truth and to be inundated with letters of love – I will not reject them this time I will not tell the teacher and I will not let the sender be chased down the road – the  love letter will be reciprocated – the love will be returned and the desire to express will be enclosed until each side drops to reveal a love so previous that it will shine through the night.

God Willing

~Hanya~