My dear mamoo

a very sad end to a man so gentle so loving and so dear to us all

the regret coated with pain of not doing more for him while he lived and breathed the air we do will journey with us till the end

may Allah grant him a good place and free him from any burdens he carries Inshallah.

so sad for a man so soft

so sad for my dear uncle who has lost his life to such tragic events caused by his own.

an event that no one will forget

an event that will bring tears whenever his sincere and humble smile comes to mind.

Allah un ko Janath Naseeb Karein

Ameen

Ray of Sunshine

My ray of sunshine is currently shining upon the Indian subcontinent, yep two whole weeks and absence always makes the heart grow fonder whenever she is away. I look forward to her return as the nights are bleak without our usual chitter chatter... our long updates via the mobile networks... our concerns addressed across one strong coffee with cream and one Starbucks signature hot chocolate...she'll be back and then I'll be back and then we'll be back...nattering to our delight!
Missing you
Love you
xxx

I am sure

I am not sure about this tainted love
many years of a pretence 
it was just a game
regretting was not my aim 
everlasting grief
not anymore
not today
hanya

Finale...or is it?

"Because sweet friend you and I
are like that red wall, it's a good idea in theory but somehow does not
work"

The GPU event, Docklands, London

A well deserved break with a hidden agenda was taken with my 12 year old modestly dressed daughter, we travelled down to the docklands, booked a very expensive hotel and chilled for 3 blissful days. Now our main purpose was to attend the 2 day Global Peace Unity event held at the Excel, London. My personal unspoken hidden agenda was thick crisp cotton sheets, room service, TV and restaurant food...just the usual really.
50 yards across from the once known Millennium dome aka 02 arena and settled 10 yards away from the river, I felt like I was in a London postcard. My off spring on the other hand pulled back the curtains and said that she was loving the view of the ocean!!! that was sweet, so I didn't really take her near the murky brown swish swishy water of the river Thames.
Anyway we enjoyed attending the conference and I had a bizarre bump in with an old friend that gave me a very pleasant surprise and the dream we shared as as young teenagers had become reality for her, I was in awe of her achievement...it was good
I will blog further about my own personal experience of attending this conference, however just for now I thought that giving you peeps a brief update of my goings on was the right thing to do!

Return with a twist

Okay... hormones give it a rest and let me get back to MY normal psychotic day to day routine... it isn't happening, I can't set myself free from a huge bubble gum bubble I seem to have fallen into and sunk in so deep that it has enclosed around me and yes it can be sweet and pink and all things nice but I have lost all control.

I can't
eat
sleep
think
work
chat
dress
comb
tidy
organise
drink
puff
shake
jump
caffeinate
chase
laugh
instead it has all been replaced with
crave
cry
sleep
tire
watch
weep
cry
sleep
crave
tire
eat
not eat
crave
tire
sleep
yawn
cry
not much fun really - I have many many supporters around me but I have to ask myself, how useful are these supporters? I mean I ask my much loved sibling to make me spaghetti bolognese...easy enough really but this is where the madness starts!!!!
I have a vision - spaghetti Bolognese
I think about the taste of that vision
all is good!!!
I sit down at the dining table
she used egg spaghetti, why I ask myself why o why??? therefore it was flat....it did not look like my vision!!! she also added mushrooms (which I have loved from the age of three) BUT NOT ANYMORE!!!! this is what I have been trying to warn everyone about...DO NOT USE YOUR INITIATIVE...if I have said spaghetti Bolognese then that's it - not mushrooms....not egg spaghetti!!!!!! just the vision and the taste that I associated with that vision!!!! eesh......